Annihilate the Twitter Virus

Twitter is the new texting. Texting was the new Instant Messaging. IM was the new Chat Rooms. Chat Rooms were the new forum.

• Forums were a new form of global communication among like-minded people. You left messages on boards and waited for someone to reply to your question or comment. Forums are generally topically organized and easy to follow.

• Twitter is a new form of global communication among like-minded people. You leave messages on one large conglomerate board and you  wait for someone to reply back to your nonsense 140 character message about no particular topic. It has no structural arrangement and is almost impossible to follow.

Interesting progress..

Twitter: Much worse than an Evolution

The real frustrating part about this thing called Social Media is that you don’t leave behind the old form when you evolve into the new one. In true evolutions, the new mutation overtakes the previous and allows you to progress without wasting time on the old form. But this is not the case with global communication.. Therefore it is not an evolution.

It is a virus.

Take Control of the Twitter Virus TODAY

Over the previous month, I have been attempting to overtake the global communication virus that is living inside of me. If the virus goes unchecked, disastrous consequences can result which will infect your entire personal and professional life.

Don’t worry about your social life because you lost that opportunity the minute you stepped into the Twhirl/Tweetdeck debate.

I realized I needed to find a cure when I was working on some homework. As I was glancing through the book, my phone started buzzing like a bee on crack. I had four people sending me texts at the same time. I looked over to my computer that was tempting me with its seductive screen and it had five IM windows. I clicked my twitter window (I use Twhirl for you geeks) and I had 3 replies about some kind of fart or new online marketing strategy.

And I didn’t bother checking Myspace or Facebook.

Twitter Destroys the Chance with Jennifer Aniston

I wasted an entire day of study to receive updates on my geeky friends and celebrities that I have never met in my entire life. My life flashed before my eyes and I realized that if I did not get this under control then I would not pass My courses.

which leads to dropping out of school.. which leads to not obtaining that $100,000 a year job.. which leads to not wooing women.. which leads me to not marrying Jennifer Aniston!

So in order to to maintain my realistic and lifelong goal of marrying Jennifer Aniston and also finishing college, I did what any sane man would do.. I emailed the professor, told him that I had been sick and asked for an extension on the paper. Afterwards, I reentered into the twitterverse and fed into my texting addiction.

After all, What Would Jesus Robert Scoble Do?

Don’t forget to feed the virus and add me as your friend on Twitter.