“Not forgiving is like drinking cat poison and then waiting for the rat to die.” – Anne Lamott

How well do you forgive others?

I have really started to think about how poorly I am at forgiving others. I hold on to a grudge for years. I still hold it against my college friends who always picked me last for intramural basketball. One of these days, this 5’8″ white boy with the coordination of a drunk man on stilts will school each of one of them in a lethal game of 1 on 1.

On a serious note, God truly calls us to forgive others. How can we expect forgiveness to be lavished upon us if we don’t share the same sentiments on forgiving others?

Bible Verses on Forgiving Others

1. Now, however, it is time to forgive and comfort him. Otherwise he may be overcome by discouragement. 2 Corinthians – 2:7
2. When you forgive this man, I forgive him, too. And when I forgive whatever needs to be forgiven, I do so with Christ’s authority for your benefit, - 2 Corinthians 2:10
3.  Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. – Ephesians 4:32
4. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. – Colossians 3:13
5. If you forgive anyone’s sins, they are forgiven. If you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven. -John 20:23
6. Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven. – Luke 6:37
7. and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us. – Matthew 6:12
8. If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you.  – Matthew 6:14
9. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins. – Matthew 6:15
10. Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone^[a]who sins against me? Seven times?”  “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!Matthew 18:21-22
11. Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. 33 Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you? – Matthew 18:32-33
12. That’s what my heavenly Father will do to you if you refuse to forgive your brothers and sisters from your heart – Matthew 18:35
13. so that the Scriptures might be fulfilled: ‘When they see what I do, they will learn nothing. When they hear what I say, they will not understand. Otherwise, they will turn to me and be forgiven. – Mark 4:12
14. But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too. – Mark 11:25
15. “I tell you, her sins—and they are many—have been forgiven, so she has shown me much love. But a person who is forgiven little shows only little love.” - Luke 7:47
16. and forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us. And don’t let us yield to temptation. – Luke 11:4
17. So watch yourselves! “If another believer sins, rebuke that person; then if there is repentance, forgive. – Luke 17:3
18. Even if that person wrongs you seven times a day and each time turns again and asks forgiveness, you must forgive. – Luke 17:4
19. If you forgive anyone’s sins, they are forgiven. If you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven. – John 20:23
20. If you forgive anyone’s sins, they are forgiven. If you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven. – Romans 4:7 

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• 4 Inspirational Bible Quotes To Enhance Your Day
• Free Daily Devotions Online
• Bible Memory Verses for Kids and Children
• Inspirational Bible Verses about Family

Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. – 1 John 3:18

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• Dan Brown,John Mayer and the Power of Secrets
• The Persistence Needed To Change The World
• Learning to Trust in God Through Difficult Times
• Touch: The Secret to the Present

A God-loyal life keeps you on track;
sin dumps the wicked in the ditch.

A pretentious, showy life is an empty life;
a plain and simple life is a full life. – Proverbs 13:6-7

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• Today I will Dream of a Roman Poet
• Controlled By Emotion
• Redefining Progress in a Simple Craft Shop
• Stay Still in the Present

“I do not at all understand the mystery of grace – only that it meets us where we are but does not leave us where it found us.”

Admitting a Mistake Will Transform Your Life

How far will you drive before you admit a mistake and must turn around?

How I Enjoyed the Day After Admitting My Own Mistake

This morning, I took my 2 sons blackberry picking. They were extremely psyched to go. They are always excited to go anywhere. I could say, “Hey, lets go sit in a cardboard box for 3 days straight and they would shout for joy and say I am the most awesome daddy in the world.

Kids just enjoy experiencing every aspect of life you can give.

We have went blueberry picking the past couple of years, but this was the first time for blackberries. I was informed that I actually missed the season for the blueberries which was a bummer so I decided I’d try blackberries this year. It was a new experience, and also a new farm.

I had no idea where it was located.

I planned to meet with my friend. She went the previous weekend and knew the route quite well. She always knows the route and is always prepared. I would be more jealous of her if it wasn’t for the fact I have grown to depend on her for my sanity. A smart man would’ve asked her for the directions and written them down.

People have accused me of many labels but smart man is not a popular one.

Instead of paying attention to my friend’s directions, I nodded my head and acted in my cool, nonchalant way. I pretended that I completely knew how to get there and I daydreamed about what song I was going to sing on my American Idol audition.

I knew there was a left turn at a light and some other road that I’d see.

The boys and I started driving down the highway. We entered dense woods and I figured that the road will approach us soon. I kept an eye out for the road where I needed to turn, but mostly focused on singing a family chorus of “Jingle bells, batman smells. Robin laid an egg…”

Yes, I am a single father with 2 sons. What song would you expect us to sing?

20 or so miles past and I started to wonder, “Did I miss the road? Should I turn around?” I decided against it. When all else fails, the best decision is always to go straight. Eventually, you will end up where you want or China. Either way, you know what you must do next.

“Welcome to Alachua County”

All of a sudden, I saw a large green sign that read, “Welcome to Alachua County.” Alachua County sits next to my own and is 30 miles past my destination. I pulled over to the side of the road and quickly turned the other way. I called my friend and said, “I think I am lost. Where was I supposed to turn?”

The boys asked why did I turn around and I told them that daddy got lost. They looked at each other and giggled, “Silly daddy, he always gets lost.”

I finally got us to the blackberry farm where we met up with my friend and we enjoyed the rest of the afternoon, but the experience led me to think about the truth of our stubbornness as a people. We alway continue down our own way no matter what God whispers in our heart until there is a big green sign that smacks us in the head and reads, “Hey, idiot. turn around. You missed your turn 20 miles the other way.”

In Order to Succeed You Must Know When to Turn Around and Admit Your Mistakes

In what ways are you continuing to drive straight in life when you were supposed to turn a hundred miles back?

Ask any Blogger and she will tell you that Seth Godin is king. Ask any marketer and he will tell you that Seth Godin is their hero. Seth Godin is to Marketing as Oprah is to women. His word is golden, literally. He sells millions of copies with every single book that he writes.

The Dip: A Little Book That Teaches You When to Quit (and When to Stick)
is one of his shortest yet most profound and popular books. In it, he discusses that sometimes we must quit in order to succeed. There will come a time in every endeavor in life that struggles will come and we will feel lost.

Do we persist and stick to the course? Seth says that we should quit.

We are taught at a young age that we must stay on track and never falter. We adhere to the cliche, “Winners never quit”. You will only achieve success and wealth when you ignore everyone else and stick to what is in front of you.

You admit to making a mistake the minute you quit or turn around.

The Illusion that Pride Fools You Into Believing About Your Mistakes

Pride sits inside the dark parts of our hearts and pulls to take control of it all. Pride tells us that we must never admit to making a mistake. We must never let anyone know we are lost. We must never turn around. We must never say I am sorry.

We must always believe that straight is always right.

While pride tries to fool you into believing that it has the secrets to personal wealth and success, it does not. It has ulterior motives. Pride wants to push everyone out of your life. Pride wants to get you completely alone in the dark so that it can feed off the energy that pours from your spirit.

Pride is a leech and an idiot.

The Most Influential People Have Owned Up to Their Mistakes

You must admit mistakes and you must turn around if you want to fully live the passions that God has placed inside of your heart. Michael Jordan stunk at professional baseball before returning to basketball in route to become one of the most prolific players in all of sports. Abraham Lincoln was a horrible businessman. He failed and bankrupt every time he opened shop before he realized his true calling of becoming one of America’s most important presidents.

I could not have enjoyed the delicious blackberry pie my sister made without admitting my own mistake and turning the car around.

One of the most beautiful and difficult aspects of the Christian faith is that we must give up on trying to reach heaven ourselves. We try for a perfect life. We work hard to find success and personal fulfillment, but we continue to make mistakes at every possible opportunity.

Such is life.

Pride and Mistakes that You Don’t Admit Will Control Your Life

The prophet Jeremiah wrote as a cry to the Israel people, “they did not listen or pay attention; instead, they followed the stubborn inclinations of their evil hearts. They went backward and not forward.” He was begging them to take a moment to stop and look at their hearts. He wanted them to know that they would fall into destruction if they continued down the path.

All they had to do was stop, admit their mistakes and turn around.

Mistakes take control of our lives when we don’t own up to them. We make personal justifications that are pure crazy in order to fuse them into our lives. Once they become so engrained and justified, the mistakes create a monster whom enslaves our passions and leads us to a road of destructive bitterness.

The other day, I overheard a conversation with a homeless man. He was an intriguing fellow and was blind. I was sitting outside in the warm Florida sunshine drinking my $3 cup of coffee waiting to hear from a friend via my Google Android powered smartphone.

To clear things up, the blind homeless man wasn’t begging for any money. He only wanted to talk with someone. He started talking with the large, overweight, retired and seemingly successful man next to me. He told the large bald man, “Want to hear a funny story? I was robbed at knifepoint last night and got my cellphone stolen. There’s southern hospitality for you.”

The large man looked up from his newspaper and smiled then ignored the crazy blind bum for the next couple of minutes while munching on a delicious banana creme pastry.

After being ignored and going off about southern hospitality, this blind bum went to his next victim – a smiling young mom whose 4 year old was running around like a tornado. She responded differently and actually had a conversation with him. They talked about being robbed at knifepoint, ladies of the night, and southern hospitality.

An half hour past and he went inside the coffee shop. He went and purchased 2 frozen coffee drinks and an apple pie. He gave the woman 1 of the coffees and the apple pie.

I glanced over at my overweight friend with banana creme crumbs on his chin whom looked longingly at that warm apple pie.

Admit Your Mistakes and Reclaim the Freedom to Fulfill the Passions in Your Heart

When we learn how to admit our mistakes, we reclaim control of the direction of our lives. We receive the opportunity to turn around and continue down the journey to fulfill our passions. We are no longer wandering aimlessly down a road completely lost without a clue.

I encourage you to own up to your mistakes and turn around so that you can live fully the life of purpose that God desires for you. Don’t allow mistakes and pride control your life. God has a beautiful meaning for your life, but you must forget your pride and change course.

The writer of Lamentations says that God’s compassion and love never fails. They are renewed for us every morning. God will still provide your life with meaning and purpose no matter what stage of life you are at and what mistakes that you have made.

God can still paint your life of broken glass, dried up paint and trashed canvas into a work of art that would make Picasso cry.

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• How A Confessional Booth Changed Our Community
• Parenting After You Screwed Up
• Get Rid of Anger and Resentment in Relationships at the Source
• Stay Still in the Present

I can’t seem to get motivated to start on any of my goals. It frustrates me because I have so much on my list that I need to get done, but it keeps on slipping further and further away. I want to get started. I want to take over the world

But I just end up turning to shut the snooze button again for another 10 minutes.. Taking over the world can wait another 5 minutes.

Why can’t I get started?

Contribute Your Personal Motivational Strategies and Stories

I need some motivational tactics to help me get started throughout the day and I would like your help. What tactics or strategies have you used to start a goal or start your day? What was the difficult parts for you to overcome and how has finding the motivation helped you?

I want to collect a huge list of stories about how people motivate themselves. I will post them and feature them here at altNoise so we can all learn from one another. We all have our individual motivational strategies and maybe yours will help me.

Will you Contribute to the List and Help Those In Need of Motivation?

We all need your help. Don’t think that your story or strategies are too silly or inferior to post. I’m not looking for some grand motivational system that changes the world. I want to know what makes you wake up in the morning and ready to make an impact. How do you consciously choose to get things done?

My Sample Motivational Contribution

There was a point in time that I was an avid excellent walker and horrible runner. I tried to become a decent runner but it just didn’t work. Some say I walk like a penguin so you can imagine what a penguin looks like when they run. Anyway, I have recently gotten out of the habit. I have plenty of excuses which none are true, but I knew I needed to get back on the habit.

But I just couldn’t get started.

One day  recently, I literally sat on my couch looking out the door thinking, “Do I really want to do this? I am going to look like an idiot and its nearly 100 degrees outside. I think I am going to go strum my guitar.” I continued to sit there and watch outside. I knew that I needed to walk, but I couldn’t get motivated.

After 45 minutes of staring, I said outloud, “Stephen, quit being wimp. Just go walk outside. Walk to the road and if you want to continue then walk some more.”

So once I acknowledged my grandmother giving me strange looks for mumbling to myself, I stepped outside. I walked down to the road and continued. I kept walking for close to  2 1/2 hours. I would’ve walked some more, but it was getting dark and I was scared of the raccoons, opossums, and squirrels in the bushes next to me so I darted a 1 mile sprint to home.

It was exhilarating.

Focus on the First Step Not the Entire Project.

So my motivating contribution is to focus on taking one small step. Don’t focus on the entire project or everything that you must get done. This becomes overwhelming. All you need to do is take 1 step, write 1 word, put your feet on the ground, grab 1 piece of fruit. You can choose to continue after that initial movement.

You have a lifetime to take over the world. Today all you need to do is open the door.

How to Contribute Your Motivating Stories and Strategies

You don’t need to sign up or do anything special to contribute. All you need to do is skip to the comments section below and take 2 minutes to post your contribution. You can write a single sentence or 15 paragraphs (please be courteous. I’m the only one allowed to be obnoxiously long-winded around here). Thats it. Just share your story.

What will you win?

My friendship.

Help Us and Be Known as Someone Who Makes an Impact

Seriously, this project is for fun and a way to help out all of our friends. We need your contribution so we can make a huge list of motivational strategies together. Its an amazing chance for us all to work together and accomplish something really great. You have an amazing story which will make our list incomplete without it. Will you please share it with us?

Once all of the stories are collected, I plan to gather them and make huge post next week featuring all of them. I will list them all out so that you can print it and share it with anyone you know who needs a boost of motivation. Beside your contribution, I will list your name as someone that is positively making an impact on our lives.

* If you are a blogger or twitter user, I will link and post your blog/twitter account next to your contribution.

Remember ALL of Your Contributions are Welcome and Helps

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• The Urban Monk Comments Back

How dare they!

Well, I’ve decided to embrace the questions and every month I am going to post the changes with results I made the previous month along with the ones I plan on making on the upcoming month. I will also include the statistics and possibly my revenue (if there is anything).

Reasons to Share Insights and Statistics for altNoise

I wish I could say that I came up with this idea all by my lonesome, but I cannot. I am only a copycat. I follow a man named Pat Flynn who does the same thing on his uber-successful blog SmartPassiveIncome.com. His focus is showing his monthly income (which should convince you to stay away from a medical profession). You can see his April 11 report by clicking here.

I will report my income from altNoise which currently is sad in comparison to Mr. Pat Flynn, but won’t be the primary focus. I hope to accomplish two goals with this endeavor.

One for you and one for me.

My primary goal is to provide an opportunity to show you the inner workings of this hugely successful, popular decently viewed website. You can see the changes I’ve made and all of the ways I totally made the wrong choices. In other words, its an outlet for you to get a good laugh.

I also hope to use this opportunity to list my own personal goals for the upcoming month. Showcasing personal goals to friends and people greatly enhances your chances of succeeding in all endeavors. I believe that I was able to lose over 60 lbs of weight healthily primarily because I shared my goal with friends and family.

Exciting Things that Happened in May at altNoise

1. 17,921 Unique Visitors to altNoise

altNoise reached a new plateau in increased traffic in the month of May. We had nearly 18,000 visitors this month. This is a huge increase from April’s numbers with 12,875 visitors.  This consists of a 39% increase from last month. I am greatly happy with this results.

Even bigger results is the amount of visitors compared to this time last year. I enjoyed a 430% increase of visitors in May of ’11 compared to May of ’10. This was nice but wasn’t a huge surprise. I have written many new articles that have done very well in search engines.

I also expect a much larger percentage of increase this time next year.

2. Over 100 New Email Subscribers

I created an email tips newsletter in the month of May. My goal is to write very personal tips to the loyal readers that have to do with their very real problems. These encouraging tips help individuals live passionately a life on purpose.

I didn’t know what to expect in terms of newsletter sign-ups. Many of the marketing guru’s said that I needed to write an ebook to give away in order to get a huge amount of sign-ups. This didn’t make sense to me.

I needed to give away something for free in order to trick people into letting me give away more things for free?

I didn’t buy the hype and didn’t waste my time creating something that nobody would read. I promoted the purpose of the newsletter which is to give personalized tips to live life with passion and purpose. I didn’t know what to expect but I was blown away with the results.

I received over 100 new subscribers in the first month. This is amazing stats for the small blog of this size to receive without giving away an ebook.

Quick Note: I don’t discourage creating free ebooks. Free stuff is always good to give away. Who doesn’t like free? I’m not entirely against giving something away to increase my subscriber count and I probably will try it in the future. My dilemma was if I should go ahead and start sharing my high quality tips or wait until I rush through an ebook which wouldn’t enjoy the quality my readers expect from me.

I chose to start sharing the personal tips which are also free.

May Disappointments for altNoise

1. No Significant Increase of Time on Site or Decrease of Bounce Rate

You may have noticed that I took down nearly all of my Google Adsense ads. This was a tough decision because I was able to pay several personal bills from the earnings of such. I did it because I wanted to focus on helping visitors find all the great content on my website and subscribe to my newsletter.

I expected that the removal of the ads would greatly increase the average person’s time on my website. There was a minimal increase from 35 seconds to 55 seconds from this time a year ago. Anything around a minute is very good for a website of my size.

2. Rebuild ENTIRE Newsletter Sign Ups

I received over 100 email sign-ups in May which was amazing, but I had to start over. I switched from Constant Contact to Aweber to provide an efficient way to deliver all of those emails. I picked Constant Contact randomly without any thought or suggestion. It was a decent experience but I knew there was better.

I switched to Aweber from the recommendation of nearly thousands of bloggers. They have a superior reputation and are considered the best. I signed up and am quite impressed with all of the great features and reports. I do not plan to switch again and only wish I chose them from the beginning.

Lesson learned.

Personal Goals for June

altNoise has grown consistenly for a long time now. 2011 is growing to become a breakout year for this website and I am excited for the many things to come. I have huge plans for this site  and am coming up with new thoughts everyday.

Hopefully some of them will work out.

1. Add Video Posts to the Site

I am planning to add a video section to the website. I don’t have an official launch date for the first video, but I am becoming more excited about it daily. I am spending countless hours on other blogs whom use video and how they best implement it.

The videos will provide inspirational thoughts and words of encouragement to help you pursue your life with passion and purpose. Check back soon because I have already started researching the information for the first video.

2. Write 2k Words a Day Towards My First Novel

Staying consistent with the site’s goal of creating lives full of passion, I have embarked on my own life’s dream – writing books. Yes, I am a nerd and if you can’t tell, I enjoy writing.. too much.

I have always dreamed of writing books ever since I was young, but never thought it was a worthwhile endeavor. I thought that once I am old and have a huge gray beard that I could at least fake having something useful to say. But I can’t do it now.

Nonsense.

Is my book going to crash, burn and not a single copy? Quite possibly, but I don’t care. I am going to write fictional stories and worlds you can discover and escape the craziness of life.

I will share more details of my first novel in a future article.

3. Discover My Passion

Barrie Davenport from Live Bold and Bloom is an amazing person and a truly gifted coach. I read her blog every time she publishes a new article. They are always extremely insightful and I encourage you to go check her out.

She composed an online course entitled Discover Your Passion. It contains 7 highly detailed modules that helps one create their dream life. Some of the goals are to create a vision of your ideal life and identify fears that hold you back.

After much belly-button watching and procrastination, I have decided to take her course. I am not necessarily bored with life but I think her course will greatly improve my own pursuit of a writing career and just life in general. I don’t know whats in store, but I have high expectations.

Click here to check out the course.

Success of May – Highly Positive with a Side of Baked Potato

May was a very great month for altNoise. I hope to keep the momentum going, but I am most grateful for all of you who regularly visit to read my rants on nonsense and life. I will continue to produce 2-3 high quality posts to help you live life with Purpose and Passion.

Thank you all for your encouragement and as we all contribute to making an impact on our world.

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• What Anne Lamott’s Traveling Mercies Taught Me on Living Perfectly
• Inspiring Links to Rock Your Life (Vol. 1)
• The Pray Without Ceasing Bible Verse Revealed
• altNoise Rock Your Life Store

If you hear a voice within you say “you cannot paint,” then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced. ~Vincent Van Gogh

Three years ago, I weighed 210 lbs. Today, I weigh 150.

You can see a picture of me over there on the right as a somewhat decent looking guy that looks healthy. I am healthy and very proud to be within a reasonable weight limit, but this hasn’t always been the case.

How I Gained Confidence to Lose 60 lbs of Weight Healthily

A little over three years ago, I was at the lowest point in my life. I topped the scales at 210 lbs and the weight never seemed to end. In reality, I didn’t care. I ate and didn’t exercise. I would step on a scale once every two months and would see a jump. I never was surprised by the findings. At first, it was depressing, but after it awhile, my feelings became worse as they drifted towards apathy and acceptance.

I accepted a fate that told me I will always be overweight.

It was at this time that my life was also going through a whirlwind of drama and I was at my all-time low. I don’t want to get into the details, but I seemed lost and on the losing side of the battle for life. Everywhere I turned, the walls came crashing down on me. The world pushed me back into the mud every time I tried to stand back on my feet.

All of my dreams and hopes began to vanish before my eyes.

Then one day it all crashed.

After months and years of this anxiety and depression growing inside, my life crashed. The idealistic world that I fought to maintain and keep disappeared and vanished into the black hole of irrelevance. The only thing that I was able to carry with me on my travel into a new and uncharted world is the physical weight that I had gained from the previous.

Power to Lose Weight and Gain Confidence

When I first opened my eyes to this new existence and world before me, I did not attempt to stand. What evidence was there to say that this new world would be any better than the last? I knew that I could count on the constant failed attempts in the last world. I trained myself to expect failure.

How could this new world be any different?

It would be nice if I could say that I overcame my depression and lost the weight by myself. The best selling stories are from those who discovered the secret to life on their own and became a self-made man (or woman). These stories inspire us because we want to know the insider secrets and not have to depend on others for success.

That is not my story.

Lack of Self-Confidence is Root Cause of Weight Gain

I remember the day to the details of the smells surrounding me and the random noise that appeared. It was one of those days that you never forget and always sit in the back of your mind as a turning point in life. We all have these days and I have several. The few minutes I was first alone with my newborn oldest son in my arms was another one of those moments.

On this particular day, I sat in my car alone. I had everywhere to be, but nowhere to go. I wanted to return to the home of failure but I knew I wasn’t welcome anymore. It was comfortable and I was afraid of the future and the darkness surrounding its mystery.

So I sat in my car at a Publix supermarket parking lot for 2 hours. I stayed at the outside end of the lot where nobody parks. Why they build such mammoth parking lots when they are never filled is beyond my knowledge, but I remained there without any direction to drive.

I watched as people drove into the lot filled with anticipation and watched as the same people left filled with comfort and security. Many of them were smiling. Others looked annoyed. But they all seemed to have purpose and were going somewhere.

I only had a Big Mac and fries in my lap.

Secret to Healthy and Successful Weight Loss Begins With Honest Prayer

Make the decision, then do something – no matter how small – toward accomplishing what you want.

After I saw a friend drive unknowingly past my car, I began my conversation with God. I didn’t pray for a job. I didn’t pray for a beautiful woman. I didn’t pray to lose weight. All of these consumed my life, but I knew that they were only symptoms of a bigger problem.

I prayed for comfort and a friend.

I Needed God to Restore Confidence to Lose Weight

I sat there alone in my car in a crowded parking lot praying to God for comfort and friendship for 45 minutes. I didn’t expect miracles. I didn’t want God to suddenly poof a cloud of smoke and appear in order to give me a fist pump. While it would’ve been neat and extremely terrifying, but it wouldn’t solve my problems.

After that prayer, I drove to the only place I knew there was a bed. I drove to family. I didn’t end the prayer with an overwhelming sense of hope and optimism. There wasn’t an epiphany that transformed me into a superhero with purpose.

I just drove.

A Strong Friendship Restores Confidence and is a Powerful Secret to Losing Weight

I received a phone call a week after staying with family. It was a familiar and friendly voice that I thought had vanished for eternity. It was an old friend whom was also having similar struggles in life. He told me how his world crashed suddenly. He lost his job and his wife told him that she wasn’t interested anymore. I tried to give him an inspirational message and beautiful words of encouragement, but I couldn’t.

I only could say, “I feel ya man.”

“True friends are those who lift you up when your heart’s wings forget how to fly.”

I met up with this friend one night. We drank and empowered one another as we said, “Screw the world. We don’t need them. We’ll become superheros ourselves and have all the ladies love us.” It was a fun night as I discovered that great friendship never dies. It didn’t change anything once I sobered up.

I was still lost. I was still overweight. I probably even gained 10 lbs overnight because of the calories.

But I rediscovered a friendship that would motivate me to finding purpose and losing weight.

Disclaimer: I do not condone drinking nor superhero powers.

I don’t want the previous story to suggest that I believe drinking is a worthwhile endeavor to solve problems. It doesn’t cure cancer and didn’t change anything once I sobered up. I could’ve had the same conversation with the friend hyped up on caffeine from coffee and red bull. I was depressed and lost so it was the route we chose at the time without any regard to life. My goal is to write this story with authenticity and honesty of events.

Set and Share Goals with a Friend is a Powerful Weight Loss Secret

I continued to regularly meet with my good friend after that night of fun. We talked a lot about sports and music. We were nostalgic about the past and the great memories that once were, but these were only of a secondary importance. We pushed our friendship into one of accountability and encouragement.

We urged each other to set goals and helped one another meet them. My first goal was to lose weight. My weight had maxed at 210. I was dangerously unhealthy with a height of 5’8 (on a good day) at that weight level. I didn’t know how long it would take nor how much work I would endure.

I only desired to feel and look healthy again.

Weight Loss Goals Should Be Personal and Pinpoint

My personal goal was 170 when I first started. It was the weight that I was when I entered college and I assumed it was a worthy goal. It was a total of 40 lbs. I didn’t know if it was outlandish or not. I didn’t care.

I was going to reach it if it took me 2 months or 12.

I told my friend about my goal to become healthy and he encouraged me in my endeavor. Whenever we would regularly meet, he would ask me how I am doing. The days we met over a meal he would check to see what I had ordered and mock me if I ordered anything more than a grilled chicken breast with nothing on it.

I hated him for that.

Want to Lose Weight? Don’t Go to the Lobby to Buy Yourself a Snack

I began changing my diet immediately after declaring my goal. I never was a huge soda drinker but I drank it when it was around. Soda is one of those things that you just drink because its convenient and you’re just bored with water. Sometimes its even more convenient then water.

I successfully cut out soda from my diet because I stopped buying it. It wasn’t a difficult sacrifice as I didn’t think about it once it was gone. I drank water when I was thirsty and that was it. I also enjoyed making some interesting smoothie creations.

Healthy Weight Loss Starts with Adjusting Your Diet

I did the same thing for snacks like potato chips and unhealthy microwave dinners. It takes the same amount of time to put a chicken breast on a Forman Grill as it does to heat up a artificial lasagna meal in the microwave.

I felt amazing immediately after changing my diet. I had energy to actually accomplish things and go hang out with friends. I wasn’t bloated all the time. I knew that food nor the world could force me into a box.

I was a person full of spirit and hope.

But I didn’t know if I was losing weight.

I felt healthy and was energized to start a new life full of passion and purpose, but what if I am still gaining weight? I went to Publix on a sporadic basis to weigh myself, but it always had mixed results. I would jump between 5-7 lbs on a given day. I didn’t trust the Publix scale, but it was my only option at the time.

Until I bought my own high quality scale.

My Personal Secret to Weight Loss is to Visualize Progress on A Daily Basis for Encouragement

I grew more and more frustrated at the Publix supermarket scale. I felt like I couldn’t determine my true weight. I was also afraid of people seeing my results so I became discouraged to go. In order to combat my frustrations, I invested in a premium personal scale.

Looking back, I definitely spent too much on the scale. It had all these neat bells and whistles that told me the BMI, weight range, and overall health. I tried to use all of its calculations a few times, but I couldn’t figure out how to tell it that I am not a female.

Why do you need to get a degree in Electronic Engineering to understand basic household stuff?

A Good Scale to Track Weight Loss Should be Detailed and Consistent

I never used the Body Mass Index feature, but it still was an excellent scale. I enjoyed it because it was consistent and detailed. I stood on the scale and new my exact weight every time. It would say 208.8 when I first step on it.  You know what happened the second time I stepped on it immediately following the first?

It said 208.8

Astonishing!

In all serious, the power of the scale was that I was able to visualize my progress on a daily basis. The first thing I did every morning after I woke up is go and step on the scale (not to get personal, but I also dropped my clothes to make sure they didn’t affect the results).  I kept the scale next to my bedroom door so that I couldn’t forget about it.

The results were encouraging.

Every day I lost weight. I was succeeding at my goal. I wasn’t losing a pound everyday. In fact, I was only losing 2/10 of a pound on average. In the big scheme of things, 2/10 of a pound isn’t huge, but I didn’t care.

I weigh less today than I did yesterday.

Gain Confidence to Lose Weight for Your Own Health not What the World Tells You

I don’t remember how long it took me to reach the goal of 170, but I did it. I reached it with consistency and ease because of friendship, prayer and renewed confidence in life. I found it so comfortable that I decided to keep on losing until I reached 145. This was my new goal because I read that is the perfect number for my height.

I never made it to 145.

I was able to get down to 147.8, but it wasn’t worth it. Better health was my goal. I didn’t desire perfection to some outside standards. I have maintained an average weight of 150 for the past two years. I am still quite strict and aware of my diet, but I am not stressed nor fearful for my health.

The Secret to Powerful and Healthy Weight Loss isn’t some Magazine Fad. Successfully Losing Weight Begins with Restoring Confidence Through Prayer and Friendship

Many people come up to me and ask, ‘What was my secret to losing weight healthily?’ but they become discouraged because I tell them what they already know. The science of weight loss isn’t difficult. Eat less food than you burn. They would rather hear some insider secret because they do not believe they have the willpower to do it themselves.

The secret to my own weight loss was easy. I wish I could bottle it up and sell it for a million dollars but I can’t because of its simplicity. The ultimate power and secret to my weight loss success begins and ends with prayer and friendship. It was through the encouragement and accountability of God and close friends that gave me the confidence to lose weight.

Sure, I can give practical tips such as set reasonable goals, watch your diet and visualize your progress. These are all vital, but only secondary to the root of the problem which is only masked by weight. Once you rediscover the powerful confidence waiting to burst from within your heart like a lion raging to protect its young, then there is no obstacle that you cannot overcome.

It is through confidence gained from prayer and love that gave me strength to lose weight.

.

I Hope This Article Encouraged You and I Ask  That You Share It By Clicking On the Facebook and Twitter Buttons on the Left Side of the Page so Others Might Find it and Gain Confidence to Lose Weight.

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• Lonely Road Home (Song Lyrics)
• altNoise May Insights
• Beyond The Diet: 3 Habits To Shedding Pounds
• Inspirational Words of Encouragement for the Christian

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” -Winston Churchill

“I am a realist. I only want what’s best for you.”

Ya right.

The Signs of Negative People and Their Snake Oil

You’ve probably heard these words many times in your life if you truly have a passion to make your world a better place to live. These realists try to pass off as someone whom is more in touch with reality than you are and therefore you should listen to what they have to say. After all, you just have your head in the clouds.

Can you say, ‘mularkey’? Go ahead and try it. “muh-lar-key’.

There was a time in my life where I allowed myself to believe them. Maybe I am too dreamy. Maybe I am destined to work as a bag boy for the rest of my life (not that there is anything wrong with being a bag boy). I should temper my dreams and focus on reality.

They won. I chained my dreams to the dark ends of my mind never to see the light of day again.

Or so I thought.

Negative People Will Try to Bury Your Dreams

I became depressed and passionless. I stumbled through the day with only the goal to see the next one fade away. I kept these realists as close as possible and listened to their advice above all else. I thought to myself that they know more than I do and I must conform to the way the world actually works.

Sure, everyone has dreams, but we must grow beyond them. We must wake up and live in the real world.

I stayed in this malaise for several years. These ‘realists’  held me captive. I was their prisoner, but I could’ve ran free if I chose. The world doesn’t actually place you in bondages. It is even worse. They convince you into believing that your own legs are useless.

You cannot walk without using them as a crutch.

Then suddenly, I had an epiphany. I began to watch these realists and how they interacted with the world. I noticed that they weren’t any more successful than anyone else. In fact, their realistic outlook was only a mirage to camouflage their bitterness for a lack of success.

They squandered their own dreams and now they thrive to see that you do the same thing yourself because they don’t want to deal with their own failure.

God Whispers in Your Heart to Live Boldly

You weren’t born to be enslaved to so called realism. God formed you with a vision to make an impact on this world. He envisioned your life as one that will move past the negativity of this world.

God spoke into the heart of the prophet Jeremiah and stirred a passion to change the world. God’s words to Jeremiah were, “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. Before you were born, I set you apart. I envisioned you as a messenger to impact the world. (Jer. 1:4-5 [personal interpretation based on NIV]).”

God is saying these same words into your life. God didn’t create you to simply exist. The realists try to make you conform to a life without purpose, but God yearns for you to break the mold.

Your dreams are unique.

I tried to shackle and chain my own dreams, but they wouldn’t shut up. Every time I saw someone write. Every time I picked up a book. Every time I saw someone pursue their own passions. My dreams would scream from the deepest portions of my soul.

“Live Your Vision!”

Live Boldly and Remove the Negative People

Your traveling on the journey throughout this life and who you invite on it affects your route and destination. You can create an amazing adventure that people yearn to share – one with breathtaking scenery and passionate story lines. You will live abundantly and full. Not a single day passes without you knowing that you are making a positive impact.

You will live your life on a purpose.

But you must choose your traveling mates wisely.

Negative people who claim themselves as realistic will deter you from the fullest journey God has for you. These people will manipulate you into taking the ‘road most popular’. They convince you into a journey full of circles and endless roads that lead nowhere.

They do this because their own life is without meaning.

You must remove these negative people from your life if you want to live the awesome journey destined for you. You cannot allow them to influence you in any way. They sink their tentacles into the depths of your soul and squeeze.

Negative’s People Control Over You

Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you are the master of your own destiny and control every decision that comes upon you. This is the biggest lie that has invaded our society. Negative people manipulate you into this thinking in order to lessen your resistance to their critical thoughts.

We all fall victim to outside influence on our thoughts and choices.

Removing negative people from my life is a lesson that I have learned only recently. Several weeks ago, I had some truly negative complaints come into my life from all around me. They came out of nowhere and when I least expected it.  The negativity criticized my personal choices in careers, how I raise my children, and even my daily diet (which is much better than most).

It was an onslaught.

I tried not to listen to any of the negativity, because I knew that it wasn’t true. I knew that it was coming from a place of bitterness and jealousy, but I couldn’t shake the thoughts.  I thought about these negative critiques for days and they completely destroyed and positive motion I was making in life.

I had to do something.

So I swatted them out of my life like a gnat that won’t stop buzzing in your ear.

Don’t Allow Any Negativity to Deter You From the Vision and Dreams that God Has Whispered Into Your Soul.

You are blessed with a truly awesome purpose that only you can fulfill.  Whether or not you pursue your purpose and dream is your choice, but you cannot allow the negative noise from other people control the journey that you walk. You must remove their tentacles from your soul if you hope to see the adventures laid before you.

How can you remove the negative tentacles that have grips on your own life?

Who are some of the negative people in your own life that you can remove? How can we lessen the influence the negative people have over our lives? Am I an evil person for suggesting we should drop negative people like a bad habit?

I’m interested to hear your own thoughts. Leave me a comment saying your opinion.  Maybe I’m not being realistic about it.

Click here to leave a comment

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• Passionate Living
• Did You Forget About Your Childhood Dreams?
• Story about Staying in School
• Passion and what drives us through life

I created a Facebook fan page for me as a writer.

Why A Personal Stephen Miracle Fan Page?

Many of you send me questions every day in regards to life, relationships and faith. These questions have really deepened my own desire to know more. The page allows another outlet for you to share these questions to me and also help out other members in the altNoise community.

We can all work together to truly encourage one another and make an impact on each of our own lives and the world.

This fan page excites me because it gives us a chance to really connect on a friend level unlike before. Facebook provides such an opportunity that really transforms how people can interact across the world. We are no longer limited by the geographical boundaries to find people who really want impact the world.

My Personal Motive for the Page

I’ll admit it. I have an additional motive for the page. I write all of my articles inspired by your comments, conversations, and concerns. Every single time that I open up a Word document to write a new article, I think about issues that I know are affecting you.

My personal desire is to provide a much deeper opportunity to write articles that truly empowers your life.

I want the chance for you to share your own struggle with finding a job or dealing with an annoying neighbor so that I can encourage you when you really need it. I don’t want to write articles that brings a slight smile to thousands of faces. I don’t care about thousands of faces.

I want to write articles that ignites God’s flame and vision for your life – Articles that inspires and empowers your soul to truly transform your life to a passionate purpose.

a Gift to the First 100 Fans

I have a special gift set up for the first 100 fans of the page. I am not going to say what it is. After all, I like to create intrigue. But I can say that it truly is a personal gift that I created from my own heart for you.

Every single 1 of the gifts will be unique and personalized  for you.

Click ‘Like’ on My Brand New Page

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• Find Christian Gifts for Dads Today!
• The Persistence Needed To Change The World
• Inspirational Blog & Thoughts on Christian Life
• Mystery of Heroism: What a Hero is About.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. 6 Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. [Proverbs 3:5-6]

Should I Give Up on Him or Her?

Relationships are impossibly hard.

I think they are designed to be that way. We are all complex and, lets just be honest, annoying creatures. We live each day thinking about our own responsibilities and tasks. We become frustrated when the old man who innocently dialed the wrong number takes more than 20 seconds to figure out his mistake.

How do we handle living in a relationship where there is always someone interrupting our personal time?

Martians will think that we are insane!

We hate when people interrupt us, but we still yearn for someone who  will stay true with us. We know that at the end of the day we cannot do it alone nor do we want to. We come home after a stressful day and all of the frustrations melt away when we see that smile that says, “I am still here. We will do it together.”

But what happens when the smile vanishes?

Our Silly Addiction to the Intoxication of Love

All relationships start out perfect. All you encounter are  smiles and longing eyes. The other partner can do no wrong. We’ve all been there. Is it the adrenaline, endorphins or Maslow’s need for belonging? I don’t know, but new love empowers us into a false sense of invincibility.

Then we naively take a running leap off Niagra Falls knowing full well that we will dive into the pool of love but instead we meet the hard and thorny surface known to all as reality. We then stand up to the all familiar voice of Michael Stipe of R.E.M. leading a wailing choir as they sing, “Everybody Hurts”.

Why do we always fall into the same trap of allowing ourselves to depend on others for our own affirmation?

Girl Mesmerizes Boy and Magically Evaporates His Wallet.. What Else is New?

Years ago, I was in love with this beautiful girl named Ashley. The ground turned to the clearest of diamonds with every step she took and she knew that every male’s eye was fixed directly on her. She looked at a guy and his wallet flew out of his pocket right into her hand.

Yes, I was proud to say to guys that this girl smiled only at me.. or so I thought.

In those days, I was truly invincible and purely awesome. I strutted down the street in my own patented pimp walk. Girls would whisper to one another and guys nodded with that knowing smirk. Life was good because they all knew that Ashley was with me.

Life truly was intoxicating in the beginning of the relationship, but things grew to become more complicated as time passed. Ashley was always beautiful and angelic. Slowly, I noticed that she seemed to struggle with the same issues.

Money and guys.

I Wanted to Save the Relationship and Be Her Knight in Shining Armor

I didn’t mind helping her out with most of her issues. She truly had a difficult past that she had to overcome. Her dad was an alcoholic and had a truly jerk of an ex-boyfriend. We would spend hours talking about our future and questions about God. I respected her as a person and still do in many ways to this day.

Because I had such a deep respect for her, I enjoyed playing the part of her knight in shining armor.

What I didn’t realize is that I allowed my pride and need for affirmation to blind me to her complete self. Ashley is an amazing person in many ways, but she also is self-destructive to the point of destroying other people’s lives. I allowed her to continue to use, cheat, and lie to me because I felt that God put me there to save her.

The once proud boy who had his own patented strut became a shell of a breathing person.

Should You Give Up or Quit In Your Current Relationship?

Relationships like mine with Ashley aren’t healthy for either party. It is obvious that the relationship needed to be ended when it is over, but love and pride blind us when we are in the midst of the forest. We continue to fight because we are trained not to quit and not to give up.

A Unhealthy Superman or Superwoman Complex

I know this will come as a shock to you. I know it did me. You aren’t a superhero. You aren’t wearing a cool cape and an awesome leotard with a see-through mask to protect your identity.  Contrary to what I believed, I could not run faster than a speeding bullet to kiss an extremely attractive woman and then dart out of the way. Neither can you. She does catch you.

(on a side note: If you are wearing a leotard with a cloth cape, then please stop reading this article. Read this instead.)

You cannot save him or her. Do not get caught in the lie that you must stay in the relationship because he needs you. He keeps on telling you that you are the only thing that is keeping him afloat, but this isn’t completely accurate.

You aren’t keeping him afloat. He is drowning you.

We weren’t created to save each other and it is destructive to think that we can be anyone’s savior. Only God can rescue him or her. You are actually hindering his own growth and ability to overcome his personal demons when you try to do it for him.

He actually grows to depend on you rather than God and figure out the tools to do it himself. Will you always be there for him?

The Only Way to Learn to Walk is to Fall a Thousand Times

Think about how you were able to overcome your own personal demons. Was someone else able to do it for you?

Anyone will tell you that my biggest problem is forgetfulness. Once, I drove past my own driveway 5 times in a row because I was too busy singing.I laugh and joke about it because most of the time it is funny, but true forgetfulness frustrates and destroys. Imagine driving three hours to go to a Foo Fighters concert only to find out that you left the tickets on the table.

The girl never returned my phone calls after that date.

Sure, I could find a woman who anally follows behind me. She writes me lists every time I walk out the door. When I leave for a work trip, she calls me every hour to make sure that I have everything I need. Truthfully though, I would dump her.. quick.

Not only would she annoy the mess out of me, but She also is unhealthy for my own life. I onlyunderstand the struggle of my forgetfulness because I’ve had to deal with the repercussions of it happening to me. There are occasions where I have forced myself to drive half an hour to pick up my phone from work at midnight even though I could’ve done it in the morning.

The only way to learn to walk is to fall a thousand times is the truest words ever spoken.

How do You Know When It is the Right Time to Give Up?

Not all relationships have to end in destructive means. Many times a couple should end a relationship even though it isn’t destructive. You originally entered into the relationship because he intrigued you or you felt comfortable around him. As time went by, you realized that there is something missing. You know that you do love him or her so you continue in the relationship but you are constantly questioning it.

You ask, “Is it time? How do I know?”

1.Pray for Direction, Patience and Discernment Regarding the Relationship

There are a lot of questions going through your mind when you start to question the relationship. How do you know that it isn’t just a plateau that you must cross? What if he or she is the one?  Are you just being selfish? We all question our motives as it is a way for us to help guide us into good decisions, but many times the questions only lead us into a never-ending circle.

When you start the process, begin by praying about it. Ask specifically for patience in direction and discernment. Do not expect an easy answer or personal resolve immediately. You aren’t asking God to tell you what to do. You need God to show some clarity so you can make healthy decision.

2. Talk With an Honest and Trusted Friend

There are two types of friends and both of them are needed. Some friends are cheerleaders and will always be on your side to encourage you. The other is one that is honest and will talk to you straight. You need to have a deep conversation with the latter about quitting the relationship.

Honest friends will help you critically think through the issues from an objective standpoint. They will always encourage you, but will also help you see things that previously blinded you. You are in the midst of the struggle and doubts. There will be important issues you will overlook.

3. Find Confidence in Your Decision and Trust in God’s Control

God will see you through this decision in whatever choice you make because you prayed for direction. Once you’ve made your decision, feel confident that it is the right one for the relationship. I cannot tell you which direction take take, but you need to create confidence in your decision and not allow yourself to doubt.

You’ve prayed, gotten advice and thought through the issues. Trust that God will provide a path.

The Destructive Beliefs About Quitting and Power in Confidence

We are told from a young age, ‘Quitters never win’. We grow to believe that we are going backwards when we change course in life. Our pride will bust and we’ll waste time. Therefore, we keep on the same negative path for possibly years and decades.

We become the old bitter person because we refused to quit.

We must remember that sometimes it is necessary to quit (even in relationships) in order to live an abundant life. Do not allow regrets or pride to control your mind. Many times, you must quit something in order to see the next opportunity God has planned for you.

Video About Overcoming Negative Thinking and Beliefs

The biggest roadblock that people have is that they allow beliefs such as, “I need this person in order to live, I’m a failure if I quit or I can’t be alone.”  to hinder the vision God has for them. You will continue to be stuck if you allow them to control you.

Steven Aitchison blogs about overcoming such negative beliefs. I really respect his writing and his Mind Alchemy course is really based on very strong and foundational psychological principles. He created this entertaining video about overcoming these negative beliefs.

Click here to watch the video

This Article is Part of a Blogger Jam

I wrote this article as a contribution into a blogger community program. Bonnie Gray, from Faith Barista fame, puts together an opportunity for bloggers everywhere to write about one topic together. It is an awesome and fun opportunity with amazing articles. This weeks topic was about Quitting.  Click here to see the other awesome articles.

---
Related Articles at Life. Purpose. Passion - altNoise:

• Story about Staying in School
• Teach Those Who are Rich to Trust in God – 1 Timothy 6:17
• Admit a Mistake and Reclaim the Passions of Your Heart
• Get Rid of Anger and Resentment in Relationships at the Source