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The Best Way To Handle People When They Make Huge Mistakes
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Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted. - Apostle Paul [Galatians 6:1]
“He is an idiot for doing something that stupid.” We’ve all thought this at some point in time in our lives. It might have been as recent as NFL Wide Receiver Plaxico Burress shooting himself in the leg at a night club or several years ago with a major political figure (I’m not going to shoot out any names). There is a good chance that you had this thought while listening to a mistake of someone you care about - possibly a brother or a friend. It is perfectly natural to have this thought and it might even help us grow so that we don’t do the same stupid thing. But the issue isn’t your initial reaction, it is your deliberate actions following.
How do you react when somebody does something so terribly wrong that it hurts another individual?
Seeking Justice For a Betrayed Friend
What if your cousin just got caught lying to your mom for several years by gambling money that was supposed to go towards old debt? This is generally not a legal issue, but there is no doubt that your cousin took advantage of his or her situation. What is your reaction? Your mom deserves justice and your cousin needs to be punished.. right?
I agree, but thats not what is important to me. I do not promote an idea of allowing an individual to keep on walking all over you nor refraining from any punishment. I believe in justice, fairness, and using punishment as a form of motivating future actions, but I also believe in redemption.
The Heart of Restoring Hurt Relationships
When all the dust settles and everyone has returned to their rational selves, it is important to consider how you will consciously make an effort to restore the confidence of this individual and return them back into his community’s relationship. You can consider the justice and consequences as the surface issue, but you then need to consider restoring the individual as the interior issue and is the matter of the heart.
We do not need to allow our pride take over with feelings of animosity, bitterness, and betrayal. When someone gets caught hurting another individual, we do not need to act superior or treat them as they are dumb. Instead, we need to encourage them and help them find their way back onto the right path. We need to let them know that they can trust us and we have been/will be in the same shoes. Finally, we need to show them how to ask for forgiveness and restore their broken relationships.
The Best Way To Handle People When They Make Huge Mistakes(3 Responses)
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This is so much easier said (written) than done. To say “show them how to ask for forgiveness and restore their broken relationships” sounds great. But how does one actually accomplish that?
[...] many of us, prayer can be lifeless and/or routine. You sometimes give thanks before a meal, ask for forgiveness after cursing out a reckless driver or request direction in making a life decision. We do these [...]
What do you do when the people that have made a huge mistake tells you not to email them, and they do not want to be friends anymore…that they want to be left alone by everyone! I have prayed and still feel the sting.