AltNoise.Net

There she was standing - Beautiful and almost perfect. Waiting for me to come and save her from the rain. All she needed was for someone to rescue her from the frustrations of the day. Listen to her and hold her. She wanted me to be in the present with her.

Why is it so hard to stay in the present? Maybe I am alone in this, but my mind is always on the future or in the past. I dream of strategies and goals. Then I sulk in past mistakes and missed opportunities. My life seems to center around the question, What if. What if I do this? What if this had happened? I suppose it is a good thing to always have a plan. Everyone is always looking for a good strategy, but it is all only fluff if I can’t answer the more important question.

I don’t purposefully dodge it, but I can rarely answer the question.. what is. What is going on right now? What is my son doing? What is my wife laughing at? These are the things that I cherish. Living in the present is extremely difficult, but it is something I am working on. I need to become the guy who looks deeply into my wife’s eye at the same time she is looking into mine. The one who sees a man in need of change on the side of the road and tosses his wallet to him. We might long for the future or relish in the past, but they are not where we live. I live in a present where my son is waiting for me to play with him.

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